In an era where texting has become a primary mode of communication, understanding text etiquette is crucial for maintaining strong personal and professional relationships. How we craft and send messages can influence how we are perceived, impact relationships, and even determine professional opportunities. While texting offers convenience, it also requires careful consideration to ensure clarity, professionalism, and respect.

The Rise of Abbreviations

Texting has evolved to prioritize speed and efficiency, often at the expense of clarity. According to a study published on November 14 in the Journal of Experimental Psychology: General, 99.3% of texters have used abbreviations intended to save time, such as “hru?” instead of asking “How are you?” or shortening “really” to “rly.”

David Fang, a doctoral student in behavioral marketing at Stanford University, wondered whether this habit of abbreviating text messages enhanced or diminished digital communication. Through eight experiments involving data from thousands of people, he found messages containing abbreviations were often perceived as less sincere than those without. This perception held true across different age groups, from Gen-Z texters accustomed to shorthand to baby boomers unfamiliar with many abbreviations.

Michelle Drouin, an author and a psychology professor at Purdue University Fort Wayne, pointed out that predictive texting has become so advanced that spelling out entire words or phrases requires minimal additional effort. She argues that it may even take extra effort to abbreviate words—at least until a phone adapts to the user’s preferred shorthand.

While abbreviations can make casual conversations quicker, their overuse in personal relationships can make messages feel impersonal or dismissive. In business settings, they may come across as unprofessional, reducing the impact of a message. Striking a balance between brevity and clarity remains key to effective texting.

Texting in Personal Relationships

Text messaging in personal relationships should foster connection and understanding. However, misinterpretations can easily arise due to the lack of tone and body language.

Here are 10 tips to improve your personal text etiquette:

1. Be Mindful of Timing. Avoid texting too early in the morning or late at night unless it’s an emergency, and consider time zones if the person is in a different location.
2. Don’t Expect Instant Replies. Not everyone is glued to their phone. Give people time to respond without assuming the worst. If it’s urgent, consider calling instead.
3. Read Before You Send. Double-check your message for typos or unintended tone. Autocorrect can sometimes change words in ways that may confuse or offend.
4. Use Emojis & Punctuation Wisely. Emojis can help convey tone but should be used in moderation. Excessive exclamation points or ALL CAPS may come across as too intense.
5. Keep it Balanced. A conversation should feel mutual. If one person is sending long paragraphs while the other is replying with one-word responses, adjust accordingly.
6. Avoid Overusing Abbreviations. In close friendships, shorthand like “brb” or “lol” is fine, but excessive abbreviations can make messages difficult to understand or feel impersonal.
7. Know When to Move to a Call. If a conversation is getting emotional or complicated, a phone or video call might be better.
8. Respect Privacy. Never share someone else’s messages, screenshots, or private conversations without their permission. Avoid using the speakerphone in public where everybody can overhear your conversation. Be cautious with voice messages—some people prefer text, especially in noisy environments.
9. Don’t Ghost People. If you’re no longer interested in talking, politely communicate that rather than ignoring someone completely.
10. Match the Energy. If someone is sending heartfelt messages, responding with a simple “k” or “ok” can feel dismissive. Show engagement with thoughtful responses.

Texting in Business Relationships

Professional texting requires an extra layer of formality and mindfulness. Unlike personal texting, workplace communication should always reflect professionalism and respect for the recipient’s time.

1. Maintain Professionalism. Use proper grammar, punctuation, and complete sentences to convey messages clearly. This is not the time to respond “IDK” to your boss’s question.
2. Use a Respectful Tone. Avoid using all caps (which can be interpreted as shouting), and be cautious with humor or sarcasm.
3. Be Concise and Clear. Keep messages to the point while including all necessary details.
4. Identify Yourself. If you haven’t texted someone in the past, introduce yourself and the reason for your text message.
5. Respect Business Hours. Avoid texting colleagues or clients outside of typical working hours unless it’s urgent.
6. Confirm Receipt of Important Messages. If a text includes important details, follow up via email for documentation. If you’re still uncertain if the message was received, follow up by phone.
7. Know When Email or Calls Are Better. If the message is complex or requires discussion, opt for an email or phone call instead.

The Balance Between Casual and Professional Texting

While abbreviations can make casual conversations quicker, their overuse in personal relationships can make messages feel impersonal or dismissive. In business settings, they may come across as unprofessional, reducing the impact of a message. Understanding context, audience, and purpose helps ensure appropriate messaging. Striking a balance between brevity and clarity also remains key to effective texting.

By following these text etiquette guidelines, individuals can strengthen both personal and business relationships, avoiding misunderstandings and fostering effective communication in every aspect of life.