The chances are that you’ve made plans over the years to buy a house, send the kids to college, and retire “comfortably.” However, relatively few Americans have made a plan for their late-in-life years.

Most of us want to age in place, that is, stay in the home we’ve been in for many years. It’s no wonder that many people want to maintain the comfort of home. It’s familiar, it’s where your friends and favorite stores are located, and it’s a lot easier than moving.

However, aging in place may not be the best for your children. It could put enormous financial and emotional strains on families as they face soaring costs and mounting pressure to care for their loved ones.

“Moving here was the best gift I could ever give my kids,” said 102-year-old Gerry Yatzkan, who lives in a Continuing Care Retirement Community (CCRC) in Pittsburgh’s South Hills area.

She still lives in independent living, even though she has needed to use the facility’s live-in rehab space twice in recent years after suffering broken bones in falls. She’s been in the Concordia facility for more than 20 years. “I never thought I’d live this long or be here so long,” says Yatzkan, “but it makes everything easier on me and my daughter.”

Family Caregivers Pay a Big Price

The growing ranks of aging baby boomers are creating serious problems for their children. Some have to put their lives and careers on hold to become caregivers. Other families face serious financial problems as they juggle growing bills for healthcare, in-home care, paying for home improvements and retrofits, and more. Family caregivers can also experience severe emotional and physical strain, potentially affecting their own health and well-being.

Even within couples, caregiving can take a complex emotional toll. When one spouse becomes the primary caregiver for the other, it often means sacrificing personal time, hobbies, and social connections. Hiring outside help can relieve the burden, but it can also bring unexpected feelings of guilt for needing time away or simply doing something independently. Still, it’s essential for the well spouse to protect their own physical and mental health. Taking breaks and asking for support isn’t selfish; it’s a necessary part of sustaining long-term caregiving.

An AARP survey found that four in ten family caregivers rarely or never feel relaxed. An earlier AARP study, done in conjunction with the National Alliance for Caregiving, found that about one-third of family caregivers have been doing so for five years or more. That’s exhausting. And expensive.

The Costs of Aging in Place

While aging in place may be desirable for many people, it also presents a growing list of challenges, including safety concerns, accessibility, potential isolation, and financial strain.

In addition, studies have shown that the social isolation and loneliness that often come with aging in place can increase the risk of dementia, heart disease, and other serious medical conditions.

The cost of a full-time home health aide, which includes “hands-on” personal assistance with bathing, dressing, eating, and other activities of daily living, cost an annual medium of nearly $78,000 last year, according to the latest annual survey from the insurance giant Genworth. Of course, that’s just the national medium. The cost is often significantly higher in many parts of New Jersey, New York, and other high-cost areas.

How and When to Make the Move

“I was a young 80 when I moved here,” says the 102-year-old Yatzkan, “but I’m glad I did it on my terms. I didn’t wait until I needed to move.”

As she learned, the key is to plan for your aging needs long before you require more care. That means you need to be proactive in planning for your old age, which could still be years away.

Experts in aging suggest that we need a realistic plan for the near term and the future. When drawing up those plans, consider whether your current home is safe to get around, whether you need major upgrades and modifications, and whether you have the funds to pay for in-home care.

Maybe the most important thing to consider is your network of family and friends. You might now be able to handle things such as cooking and meal planning, transportation, personal care, laundry, and home cleaning, but somewhere down the road, you might need to lean on the help of others.

Part of the process involves understanding how much you want to depend on others, especially your children, and how much of a burden that will place on them. As your needs increase, they may need to cut back on their careers, imposing a significant financial burden on them. There’s also a mental and physical strain of being a primary caregiver. Caregiver burnout is a real thing.

When we speak with our clients, we discuss the importance of having open and frank conversations with family members, long before decisions need to be made. We stress that individuals should be able to make their own decisions rather than having those decisions made for them in times of crisis.

These are often difficult discussions, but the caregiver and the recipient must be on the same wavelength about expectations.

What Are Your Options?

Several types of senior living facilities exist, but demand is generally higher than supply.

However, the options go well beyond the old-style nursing home many people dread.

A Continuing Care Retirement Community (CCRC) usually provides different levels of care – everything from independent living to assisted living to skilled nursing care and memory care units. There’s often a hefty entrance fee and then monthly payments. In some cases, those fees are fully or partially refundable to your heirs upon your death. Many people sell their homes to pay for the entry fees.

Some of the costs may be tax deductible as a healthcare cost, but Medicare and other insurance do not cover your payments. It’s considered a housing cost, not a medical cost. However, long-term care policies (LTC) may kick in for higher levels of care. If you are in the market for an LTC policy, EKS recommends plans that provide 100% home care option coverage.

Many CCRCs include a dining room and meal plans. There are also separate facilities that provide just assisted living or nursing care, which is regulated by state and federal laws.

In addition to the physical care these facilities provide, there are other intangible benefits such as companionship, social activities, transportation, and more.

Most of all, these facilities can provide peace of mind to your loved ones.

Plan Ahead with Confidence

As you begin thinking seriously about what aging in place or other long-term care options might look like, it’s wise to have these conversations early and often, both with your loved ones and a trusted financial professional. A financial planner can help you evaluate the costs, benefits, and trade-offs of various paths, ensuring your decisions support your long-term goals and protect those you care about. Exploring your options now can give you greater peace of mind later and allow you to make the best choice for yourself and your family. Feel free to contact us if you have questions.